A million Dead Cops

dr3am

2010-02-13T13:46:31Z

i hate weird dreams. Todays i was in a fight with Geigan. Its just weird i dont know what im expected to do. Like i feel like my dreams want me to act on something which i have no chance on. I dont know. Maybe i should just man up like that do00d and ask her to prom or some gay shit. Its that or sky diving. ISS round 3 hopefully last. jeeeeze fuck dah policeee,,, blunts all stashedd, i got rationsss of cash, bricks to the teethh, money under my feet, but no stability or will to do what i need.

forsythe @ 2010-02-11T21:23:00

2010-02-12T02:23:37Z

I never was a kid to do great things. Part of me hates that. I guess a lot of it has to be defined as what you see as great. Perspective. I hate Wesley Yang is all i will say. I don't understand it, but his parents must be happy with him. I really just wanta go into the future so if i fall asleep tonight and wake up there it would be cool. Cukuo

disconn3cted

2010-01-31T16:34:57Z

I wanta get the fuck out of here. My parents basically hate me, maybe my dad more than my mom.
I'm tired, of school, feelin shitty, waking up, hating life, bull shitting, and doing everything i do on the daily.

Was it something i did wrong?
In my honest opinion no it wasnt anything i did wrong. Its just presumptions, and stereotypes. Lurking my texts and shit. I hate life and wanta die.

I think about everything Kurt Cobain did with his life now too and i guess that depresses me. WHAT IS DEPRESSION A.I or just me bein dumb. I think i'm definetly done moking though. PLEASE LET ME GET THROUGH THESE NEXT MONTHS with little friction.

I dont know what to do anymore.

18 years

2010-01-28T03:18:20Z

old.

So many more years. Time really does go by faster as you get older. Anticipation is a rotting force. Independence is a sensitive issue. Obama will be criticed by Bob Mcdownell or some shit. Vb Governor. VB pot decriminalization billz. I wish Obama would end this speech with, "In the end we all just need to spark blunts..." and then he does so hahah. My life is risk taking, but managing. I think ill be able to quit cigs this time. maybe :3. I dont know what i'm going to do about alot of things, but ill figure them out. :#
~Things i want
-AF scholarship preaseeee
-Summer/end of Summer.
-Snow boarding
-END to hustlin
~ ~ strange feelings.

2x posts is overkill

2010-01-23T08:21:24Z

I've determined the purpose of this Journal though.
Preface: I have sloppy handwriting, i know it shouldn't matter, but i've always wanted to have like a bad ass looking journal, maybe in college maybe. but who knows nosey people. This shits kinda private and undiscovered. Few know my existence, but i can still reach my memories from the start of my thinking for my self i guess. Because when i think about it this journal is when i first had shit i really had to think about. I hate that im in the same place. Writing forever..s.s.s.s, but who else can do it.

forsythe @ 2010-01-23T03:13:00

2010-01-23T08:13:59Z

I know i talk a lot.
I know im Ignorant. Ive tried not to change. I always have the lobattery sign on my phone even though im @ homeee just pickin up im up sticken up my dick for 1 yeeehh but who gives a fuckk cause i makes and spreaddd yeh dooo think i dread what i do im not zach giegan turnin my dread into my crew feelin flyyyy yeeehhhhhhh..... Liveeejouurnaall foh lyfeee....this will be discovered. I rly dont think Kurt Cobain was that coool but i meann just crazy people interest meee sometimes. I dont like the word crazy think differently. i got lost off thought i was talkin aboutt... MEdia and how blogging is a major source now, this isnt a major source mine personally i mean. PArts of me want what i say to be a major source though.... I want people to know how i feel @ all times. Is that negative? I try to be nice about it or funny at least , but i get my point across. This is shitty.... Im dumbbbb SUBWAYS DOWN WITH THE NIGGAz.

hatting lyfe at its peak.

2010-01-17T15:18:07Z

I'm not sure about anything any more rly. I'm a smoker age 17 almost 18. Im doing terrible in school. And my Mentorship is bunk. I don't know where im gonna get the strength to push my self to do this kind of shit. It makes me mad though where ive come. ASL?! i wanta be a na'vi haha CNN had an article of post movie depression, and i think i have a case. I wanta quit smoking. Help me. HELP ME. find me girl get me a car recc?!

forsythe @ 2010-01-09T20:07:00

2010-01-10T01:07:48Z

i wish the serious moments inspired me to do the greater things.

forsythe @ 2010-01-07T21:02:00

2010-01-08T02:02:19Z

Sell, yeh i do it welllll, but whennn it come to school, im behind da biggest foolsss But above them in the status and i kill the mathmetics but not data anaylisis. NEEDs more STEPPING UP.

YA.

2009-10-16T23:09:22Z

ssb 772 all day every day tired of my life wayy well get the fuck out mah way cause i do it hard and my style staysss concurrent with the flow of my turret where i blast off a cast of nuclear missiles to launch into the space and dayum im tired of the daily routine the blunts on the scene the liquor in hand the boyyyy trynnaa be a man. hahah just kiidin immah a champion conquere all earths and give birth to whole knew worlds and get married to different girls have kids of different races havin them ask me to taste this they dont know what a waste is cause its meee and i've done to many shitty thingsss to count on 10 fingers so i continue to linger @ t brits crriibbbb 7 seats and i called dibss sooo get the fuck out before i shooot and hit riiiimmm take a piece of your skiiiinn and let it chillllll and stew on the wall a symbol of the crewww wallpapered vapor tapered im wired and a high laker balliiinn till the clock struck 0s and the phoenix burns into a natural hero bow downnnn put yourr faces to thee grounddd a human approaches i shout bust out the roachesss chron blunts sparked up im all double parked up behind 7 cars i dont knooooww who givess a fuck the party then the show then the party then the glow of lights shinin on mee till the clock strikes 3 all the drinkss areee freee yeeh live the club life @ 17 teenn lines and lines i drop lyrics that get meannn and just like your dinnner im lean quick and clean pure of the intestiness that made your limbss shatter splatter bloooood and matter continue to fumble one more drink and stumble lsssdd kicks in and i hear the rumble of the AC Brandon says take your time and pace these hands me another 6 i shotgun one just for kickssss bong rip to more sips of bacardi shots doing what i ouughtta not haha. I feel good but ive been messing up. yah know? cute girls really pretty cute girls.

simplicity

2009-10-04T03:18:10Z

i wish things were simple. i hate that i picked a song and it managed to be the cool one with the flute i was tallllking about. My parents have a facebook account to attempt to lurk my shit. this is my last vestige from them if you will. hahah. But anyways i wish things were simplerer. I wish the world wasnt made easy. i wish that people understood me. I wish tooo many things and dont know how to make shit out of what ive been given. i love the flute or whatever the fuck it is parts of this song. haah i miss timmy. i miss other shittt.. my lifes shiitttt.... this is the part in the movie where i would kill myself but i dont think im gonna do that just cause my parents would be upset... i really hope no one reads this and thinks im crazy cause ever since the patriot act i feel like everything i say is being watched. i wish i could just be honest with the world and under general public eye i try to be... ill let you know that if you ever see me and are wondering what im thinking just let it be known its honest.. thaaats all we have is honorrrr... just show me a girl that wants me as much as i want her and ill be happy maynneeee....i hate this part...i just see .... all over the place nothing is gonna get cooler for awhileeeeeee. im pretty tired maybe youll know... Love c3mor33333333444lllllllll i hate everything.

forsythe @ 2009-10-02T06:03:00

2009-10-02T10:04:46Z

I like waking up @ 5 having to do shit and listening to owen. It makes me feel more like i can handle shit. You know some sense of responsibility. hahah. I wisssh i could finnnnd a girl though dayuuuuum...;;; New owen is really nice though... :D! baaaaabbyyy i'mm trynnaa find yah!?!

handleee

2009-08-23T13:38:05Z

i handle stuff well in my oppinion keys are a shitty situation though. Schools almost starting like 2 weeks ><;;! cool but not. c311a :3 n o real hopee... We won VB tournament champs yes terday..it was coolll...Ramadan began and tyler's gone its gonna be a weird year ><; a lot of friends are gone. I try not to think a bout i t though. Rotc s hit needs filling out etc etc college etc etc ; ; wish me luck friends!

forsythe @ 2009-08-06T20:59:00

2009-08-07T00:59:32Z

school start summer end mentorship end <3! please!

I hate these feelings

2009-07-23T14:11:23Z

I really hate them.. .

shiit

2009-07-15T08:51:29Z

i lost my phone i cant sleep californication was the best this is all bull. i havent hung out with anyone in what seems like awhile...its been one day. This is my last weekend till my mentorship starts. I hope something exciting happens. I lost my phone so i really have no chance of having anything exciting happen :/ I hate that love things remind me of one person. I hate all that. I'm hungry...Sleep time hopefully. I've gotten more serious i guess.

I just wanaaa.

okaaay.

2009-06-23T07:58:08Z

so im gonna just start off this isnt gonna be long. It might be hahah just wherever i go.

My heads thinking a lot right now.
-Weird to record these things
haha why'd i just try and turn that into a list.
mind flowz ~ ~ ~ ~
ill probably think that looks cool later and i was smart for doing that or at least thats what im hoping ?
People tommorow
People people people people....shitty vibes no thanks.

Ryan fucked up funny.
The Core
Intro to the story Summer of 09 niggaaaa fressh outta highschoool reddy to killl 09 so fine Syyyykee bissshh you aintt even worth a dime of some midzzzz you piece of shitt.....
Burst free style come see me.

I D O N T K N OW anything anymore!

lets hope this doesnt get me introuble forgetting recorded.... its shitty how that hppens. 1 Action results in so much shiit you know. Even one guy. I wonder if i'll be impressed tomorrow i know i wont think this way. I ll go back to just being me having to do what i have to do in a society i guess i just dont likee... People dont understand it theyll call me an idiott and dumb but they just dont know you know until they try it. Is it bad for trying ? question your self? Its just so much stuff to think about. I dont even knowwwwww...... And hahah its really the song thats making me write foronce when i type in the music section what i was listening to ill be like oh damn i see hahaha. Im dumbb.... space intro gundams sleeepy time?!

ps. I wanchyaaa

I read this over. and i was like wow. Am i dumb? does any of this shit matter? is that just being pessimistic i dont know anymore. EVERYTHINGS BEING JUDGED. by me by others fuck.

im crazzy lol night though frealz this time allz good.

Writer's Block: Teen Time Machine

2009-06-15T03:14:01Z

If you could be a teenager living in any decade, which one would you choose?

Submitted By twertle

View 503 Answers

I'd probably be a teennager approaching man hood who has trialed through the trials of becoming a smurai and is prepared to take on his task. hahah its been 3 weeks its the last week of school. Elated or NOT? i dont knowwww so rdy for the summer goalz?!

Start V Ball Team.
Car.
Moneeey.
3>?
haha alot.
sesh
ssb
friends.
new york
tripzzzzz

College Mentor ship AP GOV. AP PSYCH fuck i havent gotten that assignment
I'm pretty sure i've changed this yearrr...my family didnt even recognize me TOOOOOOOO MUCH DRUG?! lol
but internally too. I just dont careee about yooooooh oppinion that much unless i like you. you'll KNOW if i caree man. ANd fuck signing year books we got another year. And if your my friend frealzzz atm were probably be good friends for awhile. Tryna room with thomas. i gotta start getting seriouss!

IDIOT IDIOT

2009-05-20T01:47:39Z

RESURRECTION SHORT LIVED?!:!

hopefully not.

im trying for school now. Gotta get my parents off my back! frealz. Everything else is solid im pretty happy. Excited to see Cella tommorow always 3>! creeepp! i dont give a fuck. I just know what my feelingz are >_>;; IS THAT SO WRONG. haha thankfully no one reads this unless my brother looks @ it on occasion. But then again i dont give afuck! see you in the weekend.

forsythe @ 2009-05-16T03:56:00

2009-05-16T07:58:06Z

been awhile chiled tonight with the niggaz. haha I wonder if this is gonna ruin my senior year. People say im a douche but a lot of people understand im just speaking my mind. I DONT CARE IF YOU WANTA HEAR IT OR NOT YOU WILL. lol ^_^; but schoolz almsot over i almost got sniped today shit shitty. lololol well Hopefully i get Bs and shuddemup. night :#

ffxi maybe?!

2009-05-06T00:14:42Z

I HOPE MY CHARACTERS STRIPPED. i'm so excited right now moments away from possibly getting two years of work back. Not to mention being capable of reconstructing on two lost years. YES YES IM STOKED.

Job

2009-05-01T03:24:02Z

haha MAKING CASH MONEY FINALLY! get paid tommorow fuck yeah fuck yeah! rollzz!sessh fuck yeahh! i shaved my head trying to grow a beard.

Schoolz almost over i miss people i wish i saw them more and had more oppurtunities. I wish i could seize the ones i do get. Im an Idiot and a Really big Dumb idiot as We say these days hahah. well i gotta fuckin wake up early tommooorowww and do that gay project soo yeeeh !

PEace,,,<3!

b r e a k AWAY.

2009-04-12T05:43:11Z

Welllll firstday have spring break i havent gone out. Im pretty tired but i dont know. Breaks been good so far. hrrmmm.....SESH SESH SESH?! haha it sucksss but some bish jumped into the polar bear cage pretty funny picture to lazy to post; ; it feels like its been a long time since ive posted. Morganne Redd is really attractive. Im trynnnaaa :D!

forsythe @ 2009-03-31T22:04:00

2009-04-01T02:05:20Z

Routine routine. B days Hate hate <3 PE sesh ball sesh sesh sesh. things really are starting to just take them selves into sessions. Hahah A day was cool today. Ballin has been fun this week. Good pt saturday. Experience points and quests on the daily in RL. haha show mee.... i wonder what my calc grade is. This song is good. haha just went to wal mart back now! i wonder what this weekend will be like. Im taking on a new craft tommorow hahah I've gotten alright @ rollin blunts lol chris farley i hope i remeber this inside jokes. Maybe smething exciting will happen tommorow :O! im excitedddd fuck yeaaah! Peacee dawggg ._.!

~> ABEED

forsythe @ 2009-03-22T20:42:00

2009-03-23T00:49:28Z

I spoke.
What i said was not easily heard.
What you said was misunderstood.
I don't think i want to be here anymore.
I don't think i want to be anywhere anymore.
People say things.
They don't listen.

I'm Not better then everyone.

hyppeeplaneecrash?!

Ringdance was okay. I feel like this week will portray the rest of my year. Determination and heart will be questioned. Maybe through all of it though good will PIERCE through. I'm really tired of these waves. Basically everything feels like nothing can go wrong. Then after a major event or something it feels like everythings going wrong. @_@;;; sorry ; ;. The years going to be over soon im so excited. at the same time i'm not though.

Who will i talk to its a lot to take in. I'm exponentially worried about senior project, senior year, starting life. Its all so far away. I just know @ the pace im going im gonna be in next year in no time. ._.

FIND ME <3 :3